mimes are from mars

All of my important classes are done for the week. It feels really good just to be able to relax. Procrastination is a cruel mistress.

I was thinking about the mouth and all of its functions. How it can chew food and, likewise, be used for defense. How it can taste all different kinds of spices. How you think something and, through practice and understanding, you are able to communicate. The way a curled smile can travel from one persons soul and travel straight through another. The soft intimacy of a passionate kiss. An open passage that brings air into the lungs to keep the heart beating.
Although, when you view the mouth closely, it really isn't much to look at. Go find a mirror, you'll see what I'm talking about.



By the way...all men are d*cks, all women are b*tches, and everyone is crazy. The normal ones are just the ones that can hide it the best. This is just the way it is.

Now onto today's virtues...

Virtue 4: "Resolution". If you start something, you ought to finish it. This also applies to performing tasks that you ought to complete. The way I see it, you are the sum of your accomplishments. Not just creations but ideas and skills too. I'd elaborate further but I feel like I'm getting too "big picture". The bottom line...just get up and do something that you can be proud of.

Virtue 5: "Frugality" Don't waste money or time if you can help it. There's only so much you get before it's gone. Which reminds me, we need another space race. I really want to see Mars terraformed by the end of my lifetime.

Here is the first page of the book I did for my senior project class a few years ago. The final project was about 24 pages long; 10 of which I'm not completely embarrassed of.


Speak easy,
Neil

Today's Playlist:
Driving Home to Cape Cod (Requested by Andrew)

1. Shout Out Louds - Tonight I Have To Leave It (Our Ill Wills)
2. Pavement - Cut Your Hair (Crooked Rain, Crooked Rain)
3. Andrew Bird - Tables and Chairs (The Mysterious Production of Eggs)
4. Ben Folds Five - Army (The Unauthorized Biography of Reinhold...)
5. Liam Lynch - Still Wasted From The Party Last Night (Fake Songs)
6. Grandaddy - A.M. 180 (Under The Western Freeway)
7. The Flaming Lips - The Yeah Yeah Yeah Song (At War With The Mystics)
8. Animal Collective - Water Curses (Water Curses)
9. Los Campesinos! - Death To Los Campesinos! (Hold On Now, Youngster)
10. Adam Green - Jessica (Friends of Mine)
11. Goldspot - Float On (The OC: Mix 6) *Modest Mouse Cover*
12. The Shins - New Slang [feat. Iron & Wine] (Fighting In A Sack EP)

Life Expectancy

Last night at the Dining Commons they served chicken and swordfish. I felt better about eating the swordfish because, out of the two, swordfish can defend themselves. They are fast swimmers and also have swords on their faces. Swordfish are second to narwhals for being the greatest animal with a weapon on its face. At the end of the day they are both equally delicious.

Lev believes saber-tooth tigers are the best animal in the animal kingdom with face weapons. Although they do have sabers for teeth, they are also extinct. I'll meet him half way and say that the saber-tooth tiger is the best land animal in this category.

After dinner, Lev and I talked about where we would live in Europe if we ever got the chance. Lev said that he would like to live in Switzerland because it is a neutral country. If Switzerland had a pH level, it would be 7. Its a good choice.


This is the UMass Amherst W.E.B. Du Bois library. I've heard that it is not only the tallest masonry structure in the world, but also the tallest academic library (not the largest, just the tallest). When it was built, the engineers did not anticipate the books to weigh as much as they did, so bricks began shooting out from the base of the structure. There is now a fence around the building and books in every other floor. When I am afraid that my entire day will be devoured by my dorm room, I take a stroll over to the 12th floor and do some leisurely reading.

Yesterday I noticed that sliding box cat was featured on Yahoo for two days in a row. Take that Obama!

My friend, Steph, told me that chipmunks live for 3-4 years in the wild, apposed to the 12 years that they live in captivity. This got me thinking. What if the average life expectancy of a human boosted to 300 years while in captivity? By captivity I mean being abducted by aliens, which I am pretty sure is our equivalent to chipmunk abduction.

Speak easy,
Neil

Today's Playlist:
C:\>music for robots.wav (or Yes Virginia, There Is a Robot Overlord)

1. Radiohead - Fitter Happier (OK Computer)
10. Say Hi To Your Mom - Pop Music of the Future (Numbers & Mumbles)
11. Tokyo (Lost In Translation OST)
100. The Olivia Tremor Contol - The Gravity Car (Music From the Unrealized...)
101. Does It Offend You, Yeah? - Attack Of the 60 ft Lesbian Octopus (You Have No Idea What You're Getting Yourself Into)
110. Crystal Castles - No Skin (Thrash Thrash Thrash)
111. The Robot Ate Me - Tied To The Car (They Ate Themselves)
1000. onelinedrawing - Smile (Visitor)
1001. Grandaddy - I'm On Standby (Sumday)
1010. Flight of the Conchords - Robots (Flight of the Conchords)
1011. Architecture In Helsinki - One Heavy February (Fingers Crossed)
1100. Sufjan Stevens - Joy! Joy! Joy! (A Sun Came!)
1101. The Most Serene Republic - Prologue (Underwater Cinematographer)

*Numerals coded in binary for your convenience.

P.S

Look closely at today's headline picture and you can see a flying 'V'!

If you listen to any music that I've posted it ought to be Fiona Apple's rendition of Across The Universe. Her voice is like warm bubbles in your head that never pop...they just kind of float around.

Water for Words

My name is Neil and I am an English student at the University of Massachusetts. I am currently drinking fresh coffee well into a Friday night. I was supposed to go home for the weekend to do laundry and meet Puff. Puff is the cat that my family adopted immediately after I left for school. She has replaced me and is probably wearing my old clothes, watching my television, and painting the walls of my room as I type this. Because of problems with time and space I am in my dorm room this weekend.

The title of this blog is the title of a chapter of the Nathanael West book, Miss Lonelyhearts. It is really good and I am going to write some sort of thesis paper on it before the semester is up.
For some reason I find it incredibly difficult to name things that are not completely self contained. Bands and blogs and projects. Songs, on the other hand, are usually fairly easy to name...as well as pets (charlie, jameson, keifer, and jeff are all good names). I have a theory that the older you get, the weirder your pet's names should be. For instance a guy like myself would not go wrong naming his dog "Mike", while an elderly person should totally name their dog "Little Stallion". It just makes sense.


Okay, so I was skimming my bookshelf and class notes looking for something that would resemble a good blog name and my eyes fall on 'The Brief Penguin Handbook'. My mind, being the way it is, processed this bit of sense-data as 'The Brief Penguin Handjob'. My roommate, Lev, insists that this is some sort of Freudian slip. The title just raises so many questions. Like "Why?" or "How?" or "Brief?".

Since my life plan seems to change just about every week I thought I would track the evolution of my future...if that makes sense. Right now I am learning French and aspire to become a "Teaching English as a Second Language" professor in Paris.

Stay hydrated,
Neil

P.S
I really do listen to a lot of music on a daily basis and enjoy making themed playslists. With each post I am going to try and compile a new (fun!) playlist. Hopefully this will force me to explore the previously unearthed regions of my iPod. 26 gigs and I listen to the same 3 songs over and over again.

Todays Playlist:
Flux Capacitor (or songs with years in the title)

1. The Smashing Pumpkins - 1979 (Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness)
2. Yeasayer - 2080 (All Hour Cymbals)
3. Peter Bjorn & John - Paris 2004 (Writer's Block)
4. Architecture In Helsinki - Spring 2008 (Fingers Crossed)
5. The Olivia Tremor Control - Memories of Jacqueline 1906 (Music From the Unrealized...)
6. The Elected - 7 Septermber 2003 (Me First)
7. Los Campesinos! - 2007, The Year Punk Broke My Heart (Hold On Now, Youngster)
8. Neutral Milk Hotel - Holland, 1945
9. The Unicorns - 2014 (2014 Single)
10. Gorillaz - 19-2000 (Gorillaz)
11. The Hives - Inspection Wise 1999 (Veni Vidi Vicious)

And for those with a more eclectic taste...

12. The Robot Ate Me - Oh No! Oh My! 1994 (On Vacation Vol. I)
13. The Fiery Furnaces - 1917 (Blueberry Boat)

*If you have any recommendations that might fit into this playlist let me know*